Dr. Laura Blog

Just about everybody has felt hopeless at some time or another. I know that I sure have. It’s like the bottom has fallen out of your universe and things are never going to get better. You may think you have no purpose, nothing to look forward to, or no point in existing.

Here’s what to do when you’ve gotten to that point:

1. Doubt your hopelessness. When you doubt that things will never get better or that you’re incapable of doing anything of value, you open yourself up to possibilities. Some things in life certainly are hopeless - you’ve invested years in a relationship that was wrong from the start, you’ve lost your home in a flood, your loved one is terminally ill, etc. However, most things in life are not hopeless. You don’t have to thoroughly believe it, but you need to at least doubt how bleak things really are. You have to distinguish what is truly hopeless from what is not.

2. Don’t give up. Many people struggle to keep going because they’ve tried and tried, only to feel more negative than they did before. Yet, you have to keep in mind that you haven’t tried everything.

3. Ask yourself if you’re holding on to feeling hopeless. Some people want to hold on to pain or continue to be the victim in order to protect themselves. Even though being miserable is uncomfortable at least it’s familiar. They think that if they don’t try, they won’t be exhausted, frustrated, or confused. It’s simply easier to be miserable. However, if you want a quality life between now and dead, you need to make the transition to feeling hopeful and purposeful.