I wanted to share how a piece of advice that I have gleaned from listening to your show has changed my perspective; then my attitude. My husband and I are about to celebrate 25 years of marriage.
The first few years seemed bad due to his undiagnosed mental health problems. Problems continued, due to his unwillingness to stay on his medication. Our unaddressed emotional brokenness added huge amounts of stress to the situation as well. We spent the next several years working on ourselves, so we could rebuild our marriage. We worked hard and things got much better. Unfortunately, I continued to struggle with the past.
One day, I was listening to the show and I heard you explain a concept about illness and relationships. How in relationships and illness (physical or mental), the one who is sick gets better and the other person has to come to terms with losing the sense of superiority over the now healthy person. It was like a thunder bolt. I was still thinking of myself as superior to my husband! I was actually aggravated that he was a healthy, functioning, considerate partner. Boy, was that the moment I realized I had to crawl down off my self-seated throne to be my husband's fully engaged and equal partner.
Thank you for the words of wisdom!
Jessica
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