Dear Dr. Laura,
A few years ago, my wife of 18 years and mother of my seven children passed away suddenly from a condition called spontaneous coronary artery dissection. I left for work at 8:00 with her showing no signs of anything wrong, and by the time I got to the hospital at 11:00, she was gone. My baby girl was five months old at the time and my oldest child was fifteen.
I began to contemplate life moving forward. I couldn't fathom any woman in her right mind would want to marry a man with seven kids still living at home. I decided I would probably be single for quite a while.
When my wife was alive, we were part of a small group at our church. I suddenly found myself feeling like a fifth wheel around them. A lady from church, who I have known for years, began asking how I was doing. I told how I was feeling around my married friends, and she completely understood since she was divorced. It was nice for someone to understand.
We continued communicating and were amazed at how much we had in common. We start dating. My mom suggested my girlfriend come to the house to see what life with seven kids is like. So she did. What I saw was her loving and establishing relationships with my kids. Finally, I proposed to her, and she said yes. We decided to wait a year to get married. Then my three older children told me they wanted to talk to me. My daughter said, "Dad, do you love her?" I said, "Yes, I do." My daughter said, "Then why are you waiting a year to get married? We're ready for her to be here now." We were married three weeks later.
It was quite a transition for her. Her son was an adult, so she had raised her kid. Now she was starting all over. She came into my family and took on the role of mother in the most wonderful way. All of the kids call her Mom, and she loves them like she gave birth to them.
I listen to your show and make sure I am doing what I need to do to be a good husband and father. I am blessed to have all of them! Thank you!
Paul
