Dear Dr. Laura, 

I'm a L O N G-time listener, first-time emailer. Recently, you took a call from a young woman who had no love or respect for herself, and it brought back some painful memories of my own. 

I too felt undeserving and ugly in my younger years, which with hindsight, was simply not true. I was awkward, yes! I worked in a very small office, but we had a very pretty, sophisticated, young sales woman, older than I, who called on us regularly. She always looked so well put together and chic. Oh, how I admired her, and she was so smart too. She helped by teaching me parts of my job and how it related to her company. I never would have had the nerve to ask her to help me with a makeover too, so I embarked on it in my own way. 

When I went shopping I would only try on things that I thought she would wear. "Would Shari wear this?" was my new mantra. I passed on EVERYTHING I REALLY wanted to try on AND BUY what she would wear.  I copied her style, and do you know what happened? I got compliments! And with that, came a little pride, and then comfort in my own skin, and who I was to later become. Of course, I was able to develop my own sense of style over a few short years. 

Your advice was great and spot on, I only hope that with some time and a lot of thought, the caller will work at doing what you suggested, because her life will change exponentially if she does. I hope that she can become, her own best friend someday. 

Cordially yours, 

Kathryn