The woman who called stating her abusive husband would "destroy" her in court" hit me hard. I married a jerk, I never should have finished my first date with him. I was stupid. My only excuse is I was raised in an abusive home, with a wimp of a mother and a narcissistic, mean, abusive, controlling father. I no longer have contact with Dad and Mom has passed away. Because of this, I really did not know what normal, acceptable behavior was for men. I do now. 

That woman needs to know she can do it and she needs to get mad and not let him scare her. My ex was a naval officer, has multiple master's degrees and was his commands "legal officer". I went through hell getting away from him, but I did it. He constantly threatened to destroy me, and accused me of doing the things he did. She must go to attorney after attorney telling her story and listen to who they refer her to. That is how you get the best. It took 4 years, but I got the best. 

I had no family to go to, my daughter and I stayed at one friend's house for 2 weeks, and then my daughter and I stayed in the car for another week. We lived with friends for a year while I saved $ for rent. I kept their home clean, and did all the cooking and helped with their children - which worked well for all of us. Then a friend rented her home to me while I finished nursing school, (my daughter went to classes with me). Then a year later, I bought my own home. 

My ex continued to drag me to court. I agreed to a psych evaluation and to my surprise - I was "normal". He has a severe personality disorder. I was able to leave the state we were in, rented my home, and moved 3000 miles to be near my grandparents. I kept meticulous track of child support and the retirement I was entitled to...which the jerk never paid me...until now. 

My daughter is thriving and very happy, and - it took 20 years - I have a huge judgment against the ex. With the interest on the judgment, he will be paying me until he dies. I also have a collections attorney who aggressively chases this man down, he keeps 30% of what he collects and I get the other 70%. Also - my daughter has Down syndrome - so I really had to protect her - for life. 

It can be done. Sometimes you get a bad judge, but you learn. Go to court, stand up for yourself, never cry, and document everything. A man threatening the way she says her husband does is not favored by judges. RECORD him. Do whatever you have to, but stand up for your child and yourself. Stand up and protect that child. 

Laura