Everybody loses, makes mistakes, fails to perform, does stupid stuff, receives criticism, and gets excluded. That’s life. We can’t make the bad feelings go away, but we can learn to face them without beating ourselves up. Here are some words to give your kids to help them accept the painful facts of life:

• Losing. Sometimes you’re going to win, and sometimes you’re going to lose. However, there’s a difference between losing and being a loser. Losing is noble because it means you tried.

• Making mistakes. There isn’t a person on the face of this earth who doesn’t make mistakes. The important part is, did you learn something? What can you do with this mistake, and how can you not make it again?

• Failing to perform. In life, you can’t always control the outcome. The only thing you can control is the effort you put in. If you did your best, that’s all you can do.

• Getting in trouble. Once you’ve paid your dues, you need to forgive yourself and get on with life. 

• Getting criticized. Not everybody is liked by everybody. You’re always going to get mixed reviews, and you have to accept that.

• Being left out. Everyone gets rejected here and there for some reason. It’s best to expect that you will not be invited to everything or be included in every group you would like to join. Just think about the list of people you’ve excluded or dumped in the past.