I write this not for advice, but to serve as a warning to others. 

"If you don't grow together, you will grow apart." There is much truth in song lyrics. I have made poor decisions in my life, particularly in the choice of my mate. We dated for over two years after I proposed. I thought I knew her; however, there were big clues shortly after I proposed that I overlooked. We have now passed the 40 year mark in our marriage, and I often wonder why I married at all. 

There has been no intimacy for well over 15 years. We have been sleeping in separate rooms for a number of years. I told her I cannot be in bed with a woman who I cannot touch. I have looked at the options. I talked to an attorney, but at the present time, divorce is out of the question. I would lose most of what I have worked for. She has been a stay-at-home mother for almost all of our marriage. And I will not pay for the services of a prostitute. 

I have found a lovely woman with whom I communicate by email. She knows the family and has seen firsthand the situation I am in. We only see each other in group situations and there has not been any intimacy of any kind. I consider this woman my best friend, probably my only friend. I want a wife, not a business partner or housemate. I want someone I am able to hold close to me. Unfortunately, my wife and I have not grown together, but continue to grow apart. 

Please choose your mate wisely. I did not and I am paying the price emotionally. 

Junior