After college, I had the opportunity to take a job in my hometown. The pay was so low, I would have to live at home. My mother said "No". She said if I didn't break out of my comfort zone and spread my wings at that time, I never would. A couple of weeks later, I got another opportunity in much larger city. I am so grateful for the "tough love" from my parents which pushed me to keep looking and launched a wonderful career in a profession I love.

Contrary to that: my ex-in-laws harbor their oldest son (he's pushing 50). They lost everything in the real estate collapse and only live off social security... and their grown son lives with them, does not work (he owes 30K in back child support) and doesn't even do chores. Their financial condition is such they may go on food stamps. It infuriates me, so I limit contact will all involved. They've made excuses for him all of his life and continue to do so to their detriment, and that of my child (their grandchild). I can't imagine a grandparent willing to tolerate and fully support a capable adult child who won't work, making them financially unable to drive to see their grandchildren.

E.