Recently my article about my beloved son was published: 

A Mother Watches Her Son Slip into Schizophrenia 

Sometimes thinking and writing about a deep sadness will help bring it to the light-where we can feel it and accept its reality. 

Exposing our deep feelings can be a way to remove the sting, to accept what is and hopefully diminish the most extreme aspects of our sadness and gain a new perspective. 

When I made the decision to talk about my son, Daniel, I did so with these hopes and expectations. I was not disappointed and I can report I am glad I took the risk. 

Daniel is my sixth child in a line of seven. As a little girl I longed for two things-to become a Registered Nurse and to be a mom to many children. 

I accomplished both of these goals, although it didn't happen in an always sane, linear fashion! My career had many starts and stops and my childbearing spanned seventeen years. 

But this story is about Daniel. How I got him and how I lost him.